Would You Kill Me If I Loved You?
by drawmeprity
Summary: one night battousai saved a girl. is she the one who will be able to give him the life he always wanted. but how is that going to happen if they cant seam to get a long? K/K R
1. Default Chapter

Would You Kill Me If I Loved You? By: sobakasu Chapter1 Rating: PG-13 Standard disclaimers apply (basically I don't own Kenshin. Don't sue me you wont get any thing)  
  
************************************************************************ ch1  
  
Battousai walked down the dark quit night streets of Kyoto. It was a cool April evening and the sent of newly blossomed flowers filled the air. It was timed like these the hitokiri wished to be able to just stop and take in nature. But he couldn't. He had an assignment he had to take care of. How could he stop and appreciate nature if he knew that in just a few minutes the earth would be soaking up blood like a sponge? Blood that he spilt. How could he? And if he did stop for just one moment to look at the beauty around him, would the earth open up and drag him in to the depths of hell as punishment for his sins? For the lives he had taken? No, any pleasure he could receive from nature was taken from him the moment he touched a sword. The moment any possibility of happiness for him ended.  
  
Oh, how he wished for just the slightest bit of happiness. In any form. Did he even remember how to smile a real smile?  
  
The young assassin shook his head to clear his mind of these thoughts. He had to focus on the task at hand. Killing. Just around the corner was where he was to slay the two men he was asked to assassinate that night.  
  
He put his hand to his hilt and turned the corner. What he saw was not what he expected. There stood two at the end of the ally with their back to him. The men had trapped a girl up agents the wall of the ally. Her mouth was gagged and one of the men had her right arm twisted behind her back. Her obi had been removed and was carelessly thrown on the ground. She was frantically clutching her kimono closed, but it did no such good because the men were still able to touch her. Just not see her.  
  
As soon as the girl saw Battousai her eyes widened and she started to thrash harder. Her eyes held a look of pleading, begging him to help her.  
  
The hitokiri didn't hesitate for a moment. He knew these men were the ones he was told to kill. He also knew he had to help this girl. What he did not realize was that this girl would have seen him kill. And that meant some problems ahead  
  
With in moments Battousai had thrown the men away from the girl and had slaughtered them mercilessly. Blood littered the alleyway.  
  
The girl took in a shaky breath and mumbled a quiet thanks to him. She circled her arms around herself trying to get rid of the goose bumps that were caused by her trembling.  
  
Battousai walked over to her obi, picked it up and handed it to her. She took it with shaky hands. She noticed he had several lager drops of blood on his navy gi and gray hakama. Some of it even dripped of his hair on to his face.  
  
"Get dressed," he said with his deep commanding voice as he turned his back to her to give her the privacy to change.  
  
"Ok" she said in a weak unsteady voice. In a few minutes she had straitened her self up enough to walk down the streets of Kyoto at night. Though she did not look to good she was happy to be fully dressed again.  
  
"You may turn around now," she told Battousai in a quiet but more secure tone than before.  
  
He turned around as he sheathed his sword. She mumbled a small thanks to him. Her gaze was focused on the gowned and she found she was not able to look him in the eye.  
  
"Were leaving," he said as he started to leave the alleyway.  
  
"What?" this seamed to get her attention. "What do you mean?"  
  
"I mean your coming with me"  
  
"What if I don't want to?"  
  
Battousai looked over his shoulder at her and when he saw she had no intention of coming, walked over to her, look her by her forearm ad started to pull her along behind him. "You have no choice".  
  
"But I don-t" Battousai had drawn his katana and had it pressed to her neck.  
  
"Its either this or death". He looked her strait in the eye and awaited her answer. She gave the slightest nod and he withdrew his sword. The two of them walked the rest of the way in silence.  
  
***********************  
  
"We're here," Battousai said in a monotone. He ushered the girl into the inn. The innkeeper came around the corner when she heard his voice.  
  
"Oh, hello Himura-san. You're finally back. Oh- and who is this?" the innkeeper said gesturing to the girl.  
  
"I found her with the men. Where is Katsura?" he said  
  
"Katsura wont be here till the morning. Why?" she asked  
  
"I have to ask him about the girl. Do you have a spare room for her?" he gestured over his shoulder to the girl he rescued. "And she'll need some clothes."  
  
"I can do that Himura-san." Said the woman. She turned to the silent girl "come on lets get you cleaned up."  
  
Battousai watched as the two women left the room. I wonder if she'll be all right? That was his last thought before he went to wash the blood off his body. ********************************TBC************************************  
  
Okkkkkkkkk. I finally got around to doing this. Sorry it took so long to get this out. Any way what do you think? Please tell me. I want to know. BTW any suggestions are welcome. God knows I need them. ;) For you people who read Bright Light In Hell this should be much better. It's the same idea but with a better plot. This chapter was short I know, but they should get longer. 


	2. to meet you

Would You Kill Me If I Loved You? By: sobakasu Chapter 2 Rating: PG-13 Standard disclaimers apply (basically I don't own Kenshin. Don't sue me you wont get any thing)  
  
**********************************************************************  
  
Battousai stood at the well, small rivulets of water rolled down his body. His clothes were plastered to him and his bangs were mated to his face. All the blood was gone. For now. A gust of wind came that sent chills over his wet body. He new he should go in but he didn't want to. Not yet. He need think. He walked over to the steps of the inn and sat down.  
  
He looked to the sky in exhaustion. The stars seamed to frown down on him. I know I know he thought. Why do I do this any way? To make others happy? To make it so people can live a peaceful life. Can I ever live a normal life? He pulled the top he had ever since he was a child, out of his gi.  
  
He never did have much of a childhood. His parents died when he was 7. He was shipped around from slave trader to slave trader for the next two years. That's when Hiko Sejiro found him and taught him the Hiten Mitsurugi. And the power to murder. When he was 14 he left to join the war. His training was incomplete and he was acting arrogant when he made this stupid decision. To bad he didn't know that till now. He wished to go back and finish his training but did not believe his master would teach him again. No, he believed his master would teach him again, but he didn't have the courage to find out.  
  
Battousai wrapped the string around his top. His mother gave him the top for his fifth birthday. He remembered that day so well yet it felt like a dream now. His parents took him and his brother and sisters out to a local restraunt. They didn't have a lot of money to spare so that was a real treat. Despite the fact that they were poor they were immensely happy and loved each other very much. Shinta that was his name.  
  
Shinta was loved. Battousai wasn't. Battousai was feared. Shinta was happy. Battousai is not. He wished to be Shinta again, to be loved, to be cared for, to be innocent. Battousai could never be innocent again. Battousai could never be loved. Or could he?  
  
But who would love him? No one.  
  
He had to quit thinking like this. Think of something else. Self-pity is going to do you no good. He told himself. A breeze flew by reminding him where he was. He should get inside and go to sleep.  
  
He picked up his top and his katana and went inside.  
  
*****************************  
  
Battousai walked in thought the kitchen and noticed that there was some one he did not recognize digging through one of the cabinets. He crept closer and noticed the person was in a yukata and that their hair was down.  
  
"Who are you?" he questioned.  
  
"Eeeep!" The person jumped up and spun around. It was the girl he saved earlier that night. She had washed up and was in clean clothes now.  
  
"What are you doing here?" he asked  
  
"Um... I was hungry so I came down to get some food." She said  
  
He gave a small nod of understanding and turned to leave.  
  
"Wait!" said the girl.  
  
He turned back around. She had a slight blush to her face and was looking down at the ground. "What?"  
  
"Um... well I ... um... its just..." she stammered  
  
"Yes"  
  
There was a moment of silence before she lifted her head and looked him in the eye. Time seamed to stop. She was stunning. Her dark silky hair flowed down her back, little wisps falling in her face. Her ivory skin was colored with a small blush. And her eyes, the bright blue orbs, they were sparkling with a hint of shyness. She was perfect.  
  
He was brought back to reality when he saw her hand waving around in his face.  
  
"Are you ok?" she asked  
  
"I'm fine. What did you say?"  
  
"Thank you for stopping those men."  
  
"What were you doing out there any way?" he said it as if it was no big deal but he really did care.  
  
"I was going home. I live near the alley and that was a shortcut. I guess I had it coming."  
  
"What?" now he was confused.  
  
"That's not the first time that happened." She said with a bittersweet smile on her face. "That has happened before. Twice in fact. In that same alley."  
  
I'm sorry he wanted to say that out loud but the words wouldn't come. What did come out, as was "oh." Wow! I sounded like an idiot.  
  
"That doesn't matter any more." She said, "I'm going to go to sleep now. Thank you again."  
  
She turned the corner and was out of Kenshin's sight. With a sigh he picked up his katana and started to leave the room when she came running back in. He looked at her a little surprised. She looked embarrassed or was it shy?  
  
"Um....... I forgot to ask you what your name was." A cute blush tinted her cheeks.  
  
"Himura Kenshin"  
  
"I'm Kamiya Kaoru. Well good night." She gave a slight bow and walked off to her room.  
  
Kenshin watched her walk down the hall. "Good night," he said quietly as he headed of to his room.  
  
************************************  
  
The next morning Kenshin sat in Katsura's office awaiting Kaoru's arrival. Kenshin didn't get much sleep last night do to his many nightmares. Nightmares were a constant occurrence in Kenshin's life. He grew up with them. They were the only consistent things in this life. The only things he could rely on. Thou he wished they weren't. He wished to rely on something else. But what?  
  
Just then Kaoru entered the room. She had her hair up in a high ponytail and was wearing a white gi and blue hakama. Now that was not something he expected to see. Last night he got the impression that she was some cute little girly, girl who liked pretty ribbons and elegant kimonos. I guess not.  
  
She sat down between Kenshin and Katsura, "umm... so what exactly am I doing here?"  
  
"You are here to discuses the events of last night, and what is to happen." Katsura said truthfully.  
  
"Ok" she said.  
  
"Is it true that you saw Himura" he gestured to Kenshin, "kill last night?"  
  
"Yes" she replied sincerely.  
  
"Would you tell me what you were doing in that alley?"  
  
"I was walking home when the two men came and tackled me to the ground. They tried to rape me but Kenshin came in time and killed the men. Then he brought me back here," she said. Katsura turned to Kenshin, "Is this what happened Himura?"  
  
"Yes sir," Kenshin nodded his head slightly.  
  
Katsura then turned back to kaoru "are you a spy?"  
  
"Nani? No!" she was a little confused now.  
  
"Good," Katsura turned and contemplated over this situation. There was a moment of silence in the room before Katsura spoke again. "Its decide you Kamiya-san will stay here in the inn for the time being. You may leave for no reason."  
  
"What?!" she screamed. "No way! I have a home, I have a family! You can't hold me hostage."  
  
"I'm afraid we can. And from what I've gathered from my sources your parents are dead. Are they not?" he asked simply.  
  
Kaoru bowed her head and muttered a small yes.  
  
"Himura I'm placing your in charge of her. You are to know where she is at all times and to make sure she is out of harms way. Got it?"  
  
"Yes sir," Kenshin said confidentially.  
  
"Good. You two may leave now. Himura I wish to see you after dinner." Katsura said.  
  
Kenshin gave a slight nod and the two left the room.  
  
*******************************  
  
" Kenshin! Kenshin!" Kaoru walked down the hall of the inn looking for Kenshin. It was dinnertime and she had no idea were the dining hall was. She turned the corner and ran into something. Something soft yet hard at the same time. After she regained her senses she looked to see what it was that she ran into. Her eyes met with piercing gold. It was Kenshin. She had never noticed how amazing his eyes are. Nor had she noticed how amazing every thing about him was. His gorgeous red hair. His smooth skin. His firm chest. Witch she currently had her hands pressed against. That brought her back to reality. But could you blame her. She was a 15 year- old girl staring up at a very hot guy.  
  
"Um... I was looking for you." She stated  
  
"What do you want?" he said in a cool tone of voice.  
  
"I wanted to know were the dining hall was but if I knew you were going to be such a jerk about it I would have found it myself." He may be hot but he was lacking in personality.  
  
"Then why didn't you do that in the first place," he snapped back.  
  
"I don't know! I just didn't!" she yelled at him.  
  
He went past her and walked down the hall towards the dining hall. Kaoru stared at his back flabbergasted.  
  
He stopped and turned his head over his shoulder to look at her. "Are you coming or not?" he asked annoyed before walking down the hall again.  
  
"Hey, wait!" Kaoru ran to catch up with him.  
  
She went on rambling how rude he was being as she trailed behind him but it fell on deft ears. He opened the door to the dining hall and entered. Kaoru right behind him realized he was paying no attention to her.  
  
She entered the room and yelled at the top of her lungs, "KENSHIN PAY ATENTION TO ME!!!" that's when she noticed all the other chosu men in the room staring at her.  
  
"No," was all Kenshin said.  
  
That pissed kaoru off and she forgot about all the other people in the room. She grabbed the bowl of rice of the tray of the person closeted to her. By this time Kenshin had sat down and began to eat his dinner not paying attention to any of he ranting. She walked up in front of him and dumped the bowl of rice on his head.  
  
"Haha... serves you right. You know you should be more polite to a lady." She smirked at his bowed head that was covered in rice.  
  
Just then Kenshin turned his head up to her. His eyes were closed and he has a smile on his face, a wicked smile. Slowly he opened his eyes. This time, Kaoru noticed, they were glowing a vicious amber. She took a step back when he pushed himself up with his katana and advanced towards her.  
  
Kenshin grabbed her by her wrist and pulled her towards him. Once again she was pressed agents his chest except for this time she had a sword pressed to her neck.  
  
"No kaoru my dear. You have it all wrong. What you mean is you should be more polite to Hitokiri Battousai," he said in a low voice with a wicked grin on his face.  
  
He looked so sexy and being pressed to him was a very nice feeling but that little fact that he could kill her with just a flick of his wrist made the good feelings disappear.  
  
He backed away and sheathed his sword. He let go of the shell-shocked girl and turned backed around and picked up his own bowl of rice. He walked back to her with the bowl of rice in his hands. His evil smirk widened. He grabbed the folds of her gi and pulled them out and dumped the bowl of rice down her gi.  
  
With a slight bow he bade good night and walked out of the room as if nothing happened. Kaoru just stared at the wall in front of her for a moment before she realized what happened. Coming out of her trance she knocked some of the rice out of her shirt. Oh... Kenshin you're going to get it! She ran out of the room after him, jumped on his back and started to hit his shoulder all the wile cussing at him.  
  
"I don't care if you are Battousai I'm not afraid of you, you butt-munch! God you're the biggest asshole I know! I HATE YOU!" she ranted on like this clinging to his back while he walked to meet Katsura.  
  
"Get off," he snapped as he reached the door to the room Katsura was in. He attempted to get her of his back by flipping her over his shoulder, but that didn't work out as planed. At the last moment kaoru through her body forward witch caught Kenshin off guard and sent the two of them crashing through toe rice paper doors. Kaoru landed on Kenshin's back with her arms wrapped around his shoulders.  
  
"Glad to see you came Kenshin" Katsura said in a sarcastic tone.  
  
Oh, no!  
  
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AN: so what did you think? Yes this will be a k/k. suggestions would be appreciated! I know my spelling is bad. I'm sorry. But I would like it if you guys would stop bring it up. I don't have a beta reader yet and those 'I love your story but you need to work on your spelling' things get sort of annoying. Why can't you just leave it at 'I love your story'? I try to spell well but my dyslexia kind of gets in the way, but I still try. :) Any way thanks for the reviews. Keep them coming. ttyl. 


	3. AN note1

Ok this is just my little apology note. I know that all of you guys have been waiting for an update but you see I've had a very bad case of writers block and have had some difficultly coming up with stuff. But I do have one idea but it isn't until later in the story so I need some my suggestions. Any at all are welcome. Also I have included responses to my reviewers from chapter 2 so here they are. (Although most of you don't even probably remember me or the story let alone your own review but anyway..)  
  
Silver Goddess1= thank you and I'll try to  
  
NickeyWhite2= I'm glad u like it  
  
Karouxxxk= I'm not sure what kaoru gets to do yet I'm having a bit of writers block and um.not to be rude or any thing. but. um.well if u take my computer how can I ever update?  
  
Kyoku-Ryu-Akurei= thnx  
  
l3al3yanime= no that is not all  
  
kaoru kamiya= thank you very much your under standing of my dyslexia. Your encouragement has been very motivating.  
  
XP-DarkAngel= thanks I'm glade u like  
  
Bonessasan= sorry I know everyone hates cliff hangers  
  
Fullmoon= wow I love long reviews!!! Thank you so much and to answer your questions: I know that kenshin(16) and kaoru (15) are pretty young but back then (1865) 16 was considered mature and adult so that is why k+k are so young. About kaoru's virginity I'm not sure yet. My plans for the whole respect thing also unsure (actually most of the story is undecided). But I like your suggestion and will probably work off that.  
  
Maruken= well. I guess it cant hurt to help the world *wink*  
  
Kenshin-Kaoru-Forever= I'm glade u like it but I'm a little confused about why you would think I'm a good writer but I wont question your motives  
  
Kaoru Himura=wow thank you I'm delighted you enjoyed this chapter  
  
Emsdesire= I'm glad u thought it was funny. I was going for a more humorous side in that chapter.  
  
me me me and only me= we may never know j/k  
  
tiaravball15= I'm glad u like it better than the other fic  
  
Dimaduialiel= yah well rice has always been a very dramatic food j/k  
  
Nim= oh yah there will be more moments like this  
  
Lily of the Shadow= the rice just seamed to fit kaoru's out going personality  
  
lidmoon02= you know I'm not to sure about the rape situation yet hosi-ni-onegai= itz comforting to know that my bad spelling does not deter everyone  
  
Princess Sapphire= the rice just seamed like the right thing at the time  
  
Serene= don't worry I will continue  
  
An Aspiring Writer= actually it was the 19th cent. I'm sorry I did not clearify that and your probably right that they did not 'asshole' back then  
  
Chiruken= yah fun that Is a good work for it  
  
Naomie Measetra= I'm sure glad you don't also  
  
Rayne Maker= thank you  
  
Sammy= hai the rice seams to be very popular  
  
Dark_Samarian= good luck with the writing  
  
Jezika= hai controversy is a good thing 


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